Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Feel Yourself Like a King

I don’t know why but when Czechs make grammatical mistakes in English they very often come out sounding sexual. Here’s an example, an ad in the newspaper for a brothel a few years back read Come to our whorehouse “…where you can feel yourself like a king.” OK – brothels, when they advertise tend to want to sound sexual, I know… But like that? I mean… I can do that at home and for free, right? I don’t need no stinking cathouse for that – and this is not an inexpensive establishment (not that I’d know anything about the prices of such services, of course.)

Another case is just the other day… The one woman on my team at work, a young and quite pretty one at that wrote to me asking, “Can I please you for a day off on Friday?” Is it just me or does that sound like a nice offer and a really good deal?

They call used clothing stores here “Second Hand” stores – in English just like that. Well… There used to be a place called Stroker’s Second Hand. Again… Is it just me being an arrested adolescent?

I’ll try to keep find some others. I used to come across them frequently but maybe I’m getting immune to accidental innuendo? Naaa…..

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Vršovice

Prague is full of neighborhoods that don’t make the regular tourist maps but are gems none the less.  In Vršovice  there is a corner that’s a great example. Bounded roughly by Moskevská St., Kodnaská St, Ruská St and  Náměstí Svatopluka Čecha, it’s an area you can walk around in 20 min. But you’ll walk through or around three parks with playgrounds and dog runs, a wonderful street with neighborhood shops (no souvenirs or Marks & Spencer – for that you gotta go downtown), a lovely wide but pretty quiet tree lined boulevard with beautiful Empire style buildings and of course many pubs, cafés and restaurants. Of course there are the piles of gambling joints that kinda cheapen the whole city but I have yet to find an area free of them except maybe the castle district. And there are the neighborhood whorehouses but you’ll have to come wander around and find them the old fashioned way.

It’s an area well worth a lazy afternoon and for anyone looking to stay in Prague for more than a weekend or maybe even move here I definitely recommend a look here. The feeling is similar to Náměstí Míru (and it’s only a couple tram stops away) but not as upscale and not nearly as expensive. Most wait staff speak English and there are more and more UK and US expats moving there – so you should have little problem finding someone to chat with.

Among my favorite haunts there are:

U Pštrosa - Moskevská 49

GREAT food. The chef here really is good. For lunch you get the regular Czech dishes but made exceptionally well. In the summer they grill outside most Thursdays – and this is a bit pricy but really, REALLY good. And their regular dinner menu includes ostrich as well as a good selection of game meats like venison and wild boar.

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=moskevska+49+praha&sll=50.068661,14.457343&sspn=0.00231,0.003594&ie=UTF8&ll=50.070583,14.456334&spn=0.009241,0.014377&t=h&z=16&iwloc=A

Nano Cafe  - Kodaňská 22

As the name implies – its a tiny place. But, rare among such spots in Prague, its non-smoking inside. They have year round outdoor seating though (for smokers and anyone wanting to be on the street) and free WIFI. The young couple who run the place, Vladimir and Ivana are very nice (they recently had a cute little baby boy) and the clientele are like a family. This is getting to be something of a UK / US expat and student hangout. The one downside, by me anyway, is that they dont serve Czech beer – just Stella and Hoegaarden. It’s one of my favorite summer afternoon hangouts.

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=Koda%C5%88sk%C3%A1+22+praHA&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=46.409192,58.886719&ie=UTF8&t=h&z=16&iwloc=A

 

Public Transit:

Trams 4 & 22

Bus 101, 134, 135, 139

Monday, April 13, 2009

Stars of Parking

The Beemer in this shot - the one in the middle of the intersection - is, in fact, parked. This street is narrow so anyone in anything bigger than a Smart will have a tough time and a truck? Foget it.

I have never seen such idiots as the drivers here. They act as if the rules, those of physics included, apply to everyone but them.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Romantic Prague - Nový Svět

The city is famous for its beauty and shots of Prague Castle, Old Town Square and all certainly can be stunning. But details can be forgotten about. This type of lamp can be found all over the old city.  They are almost iconic - especially their soft, goldish glow at night. But this shot is one I've alsways liked with the shadow illuminated by sunlight.

This was taken up around Prague Castle area, back in Nový Svět (New World). It's an area often not found by tourists just in for thre weekend even though it's just one block from the main castle gates.

Die Krack Znacks

Die Krack Znacks - Yuuummmie!

Duno if this makes me hungry or... or... what?

Friday, April 10, 2009

Czech Easter and Whipping the Girls ‘till they Give Up Their Eggs

I’d heard all about Czech Easter growing up in the US. As a young teenager it seemed ideal – I get to go round and whip girls until they give up their eggs? It sounded wonderfully sexual (it is), a way to nip some booze (it is) and a great ice breaker leading up to “How about a session under those bushes later?” (it is) and all kinds of stuff an American boy has to get by without.

You see the braided willow switches, some quite elaborate and beautiful, being sold in the city for maybe a week before the fun. But it’s in the villages where things really get going. There the boys have to braid their own. And they tend to take it very seriously. 

Size Doesn't Matter?

The Big One Gets The panties Off (Click Picture)

But not only the boys – and this was the funny part. OK, I’ve known that some women really look forward to the tradition. And despite some feminist rants I’ve seen, this is about playful fun not bruises and welts except… I have a friend who loves it. Loves getting it. And loves getting it rather hard from her husband and selected (by her) male friends – the whipping that is. I thought this a charming if isolated kink on her part. Then I met more. And I don’t hang around S&M parlors or anything. But I have to say it no longer surprises me when some young woman mentions that she likes to get it hard… on Easter. It’s definitely not everyone, most still prefer the tapping, but a sizable minority – 20-25% maybe (just a guess) – doesn’t feel like it’s been Easter without that springtime  sting. 

It’s said that the whipping keeps the women beautiful and fertile. To judge from the lovelies on the streets, parks and dance clubs there must be something to it.

 

Tales from Absurdistan #1

Things are different here than in the US, where I lived most of my life, and, I suspect, from just about anywhere else. Czechs themselves must feel this because Absurdistan is their own nickname for their country.

Czechs are a bit funny. They will piss and moan about everything here. But for a foreigners, and expat, or even prodigal son like me to join in and they get amazingly defensive. This is their country. Be warned before trying to join in the fun of criticizing it. 

A case: I lived in an apartment where the previous owner never terminated the contract for utilities. When I moved in, I went to the power company and asked that the account be put in my name as of the 1st of the month - and I brought the paperwork documenting me residency there. I was told that there was a current account for that address and did I know the person. I did not - the appt.  had been empty for over 3 years. I was told they could not open a new account until that one was current and closed. Since the amount was more or less trivial, I pad it on the spot. But that left the problem of cancelling the contract - which only the parties who originally signed could do (unless I could produce a death certificate and papers authorizing me to handle that). 

Now, the power was flowing to the apartment all during this time. The only problem was that the company didn't want me to pay them for it. A position in which they persisted for over a year, despite my several visits (amounting to perhaps 3 days total of sitting in their offices) when one fine day with no warning I got a call from them telling me I hadn't paid them for the power they supplied me and that they would send a man to cut me off... unless... I came in THAT DAY to put things right. I did and the solution amounted to me signing an official statement that declared that I did not know the previous tenant. When I asked why this hadn't been told to me on any of my many previous visits I was told that I hadn't asked for a "Čestné prohlášení" or Honest declaration form. 

And I had to pay 14 months utility bills in 3 working days. 

Now, returning to my original point, when I began joining in any gripe session by adding this, my tale of power company woe, most often my companions would side with the power company. Why, they'd say, didn't I just ask for that form and be done with it? The fact that I did ask for anything that would solve my problem and that I hadn't known that form existed or what it was called was seen as my fault. Everyone knows about a "Čestné prohlášení" and obviously they knew everything is done better in the US and why did I ever come to Prague in the first place? 

 That was about 5 years ago. I've been here the better part of a decade now and so I actually DO get to complain sometimes. Not as much as a lifer here. And not about certain things like the government or the medical system... but some things. Like the corruption (despite the fact that everyone would rather pay a cop off than pay the fine.)

 

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Miniskirt Season

Ahhh... spring is in the air. The trees are all abloom. The caffes and restaurants and pubs are pulling out their outdoor seating. The days are getting longer and the twilight sky turns those amazing shades of blue.

But I and the boys look forward to miniskirt season. The women in Prague, in this entire country, are amazing. And when those short skirts come out of hiding - especially on the first warm day - it is a sight to behold. Makes you glad to be alive...

Stay tuned for more on this developing topic as summer approaches...

Members Czech Mational Football Team Chopped for Posing with Ladies

Several members, including the head coach, of the Czech Natioanl Football Team have been given the axe for hanging out with hookers and getting their pictures taken. All this after a winning game Many here see this as a natioanl humiliation.

I've never understood such logic. Obviously male members of a high contact, physical sport of a world class level will... well... enjoy the perks of their position with perky ladies. It's one of the most excelent reasons to get into that line of work in the first place. Money, babes, fame..

Since when did boys have to stop acting like boys?

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Free Whorehouse??? What a TOWN!

Yes folks. It's true. Prostitution here is legal and there are a number of publicly advertised brothels in town, including one run by the former prime minister's wife. I understand many strip clubs are where you go to enjoy beautiful naked women also include lesbian anal shows you can join.

But that's not terribly unique in Europe. Several countries have such enlightened views. What makes Prague different is that there is actually a free whorehouse in town. Big Sister is a place where you can actually go and get laid for free... well... sort of.

You do have to sign a contract giving them rights to make you a porn star :-) and then enjoy seeing you pretty face and all waggling on the Internet and DVD... But as long as the wife doesn't peruse such sites...


Monday, April 6, 2009

Restaraunt - U 3 Trojek


U 3 Trojek (at the 3 Threes)

This is a great little find. I'm often in this part of town, Zizkov, and for some reason I just never opened the doors to this spot. It struck me as kind of a dive.

Well, I was wrong. Not only is it fairly nice inside but the lunches are quite good. And I generally have soup, a main, and a drink for under 120Kc. A good deal.

And not only that - I've been there maybe 5 times in the last two months and they always have at least one very pretty waitress. Always an added bonus.

They allow smoking but the place isn't too smoky and they do have a non-smoking section. 

Restaurace U 3 trojek

http://u3trojek.cz
Roháčova 19/333
130 00  Praha 3 
 

GPS data:
50° 05' 12,15'' N
14° 27' 18,39'' E

 

Kontakty:
Tel:
 222 783 350

Mobil: 602 44 10 88
E-mail: rezervace@u3trojek.cz


Thursday, April 2, 2009

Obama's Party with (at?) Hilton

I've always wondered... Prague Castle is vast. According to some, this mile long castle is the buggest urban castle in the world. It's also beautiful. And romantic.

And so I've wondered... wouldn't it make a really great place to house foreign dignitaries and their entorages? When Bush and his 800 person posse was here he stayed at the Corinthia Towers. Obama and family and friends are rumored to be staying at the Hilton. Both are modern, steel and glass, luxurious, and utterly non-descript. They could be anywhere. But... actually... they aren't. They are both in less than prime parts of the city.

Of all Prague's Hotels I don't understand it. 

Unbearable Lightness of Aging

Milan Kundera turns 80.
Happy Birthday!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Obamarama's coming ... to town.



As much I as love this town, this will be a great weekend not to be here. Get out of town. Go visit a casltle like this one in Cesky Krumlov. Stay home and watch Dr House in Czech. 

Why?

The place will be a nightmare of crowds and security. Obamarama's coming to town

Don't get me wrong, I'm all in favor of the new US pres. He's inspiring, he seems smart, he's got new ideas and he's not Bush. All good things. But this city isn't built for American Presidents.

So me and mine are going to the Prague Zoo. Should be less of a circus.